plain simple english

quivering with desire and the ecstasy of unbridled avarice*

“We plunged into the cornucopia quivering with desire and the ecstasy of unbridled avarice.” – A Christmas Story

My first crush was a boy named Bobby. He was five and looked just like Bo Duke. My second, Ralphie.

I couldn’t have been more than 8 when he first pummeled Scut Farkus, ratted out his buddy Schwartz for no real reason and left Flick stuck to the flag pole. I forgot about The General Lee and went to bed dreaming of coke-bottle glasses and soap connoisseurs. That same winter I built a snow man and named him R Parker. My sister saw through the disguise and laughed. I didn’t care.

Ralphie

As I grew older my love affair became less about Ralphie and more about the guy who brought him to life. No. Not the Oldsmobile Man. The White Sox Fan.

Shep was born to narrate. To tell a story that keeps on telling. I can’t say how many copies of “In God We Trust, All Others Pay Cash” I’ve bought throughout the years. But I’m sure it ranks right up there with the number of handbags I own.

So yeah. It’s that time again. Time to introduce the heathens – those not familiar with The Church of Jean Shepherd – to Ralphie and the Old Man. (Yes my friends. They do exist.)

I’ll be putting A Christmas Story on 24 hour loop beginning Saturday. And I won’t get tired of it.

Not one bit.

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27 Responses to “quivering with desire and the ecstasy of unbridled avarice*”

  1. lux lisbon says:

    By far my all time favorite Christmas movie. It does not get better than that.

  2. s says:

    hi buffy! thanx for leaving a comment on my blog. I replied there but then I thought i should say it here.
    I love your writing and hope you get that book out. Reminds me of Donna Tart’s “Secret History” which was a book I couldn’t put down.
    and lest I sound like i’m saying you’re imitating, I’m not. I’m just saying that what you’ve posted from your book has that rare quality of reaaally drawing the reader in.
    Take care :)

  3. Misti says:

    A Christmas Story is my favorite Christmas movie of all time. Can you believe that your dear “Bo” has never seen it? He must be from another planet. I have also had a crush on Ralphie and Bobby (mine was a bit older)in my time….what can I say….we have great taste!

  4. Night Writer says:

    I love this movie, and only partly because Ralphie looks a lot like I did at that age. A Christmas Story is the feature flick this week in the “Fundamentals in Film” class (character fundamentals, that is) that I lead with a group of teen boys and their fathers. As a twist, though, this week the discussion questions after the movie are for the parents, not the kids, and will center around how our children might describe our lives. Oh, FUDGE!

  5. Buffy says:

    Misti, I’m shocked. I mean, it’s not like he’s Norwegian. It’s an American tradition for crying out loud. Sad sad state of affairs. ;) Sit him down and make him watch it. NOW!

    Night, Oh Fudge indeed! Classic.

  6. Katherine says:

    Such a classic – also my all time favorite xmas movie! You gotta love the leg lamp – “frag-eal-ly!” I got the best cards to send out this year – black and white photo of Flick with his tongue stuck to the pole.

  7. Buffy says:

    Katherine, I still pronounce fragile “Frag-eal-ly”. And I think I really must know where you got your Christmas cards.

  8. snowcrush says:

    How cute to have a crush on Ralphie! I love that movie. The older I get, the more I relate to the parents. (not that I have kids yet, but still…)

  9. Andrea says:

    I can’t tell you how many times I quote that movie during the holidays. Just last night, my in-laws took us out for Chinese for helping them clear some storm debris out of their yard. The first thing I thought was, “Fa Ra Ra Ra Ra Ra Ra Ra Ra”.

  10. anne says:

    Everyone is going to jump ALL over this one…but I am Jewish…I have not seen the movie. Let the chastising begin.

  11. Fitz says:

    My older bro-in-law looks just like the grown up version of Ralphie. Haha! I should intrroduce you two.

  12. Buffy says:

    Oh Anne…we really have to remedy this.

  13. Leah says:

    Simon has been ragging on me to read this book for years; it’s one of his favorites. Maybe this year I’ll have the time…

  14. Bre says:

    We were never allowed to watch that movie when I was little, so I must admit I’m a bit perplexed with the cult following it has!

  15. I must confess that I have NEVER watched the entire movie. But Mr. Farmer insists that the entire gang watches it this year.

  16. Jessica says:

    Oh, amen to you! Hannukah is just not hannukah without my 24 hours of A Christmas Story ritual. Recently I heard a bit of Jean Shepard’s radio show – and while I’ve never bought a copy of “…All Other’s Pay Cash”, it’s on my list now.

  17. steph says:

    i loooooove this movie! and i cant wait for sat.!!

  18. Best.
    Christmas.
    Movie.
    Ever.

  19. Jenny says:

    Um…can I come over?

  20. David says:

    You know, if you’re still in the states and tune in to TBS on Decemeber 24, there will be a 24-hour marathon of A Christmas Story. But then I guess some of us need our fill of the movie a bit early…

  21. Ryane says:

    Buffy–If you are in the US, you may have seen the HILarious Cingular commercial that replicates this movie? It’s a little kid (Ralphie) and he wants this special Cingular cellphone (RedRyder BBGun)only everyone keeps telling him he will go over his minutes. (or something like that). It is such a clever ad…if you like A Christmas Story at all, you have to laugh when you see it!

  22. I love that movie. It reminds me of youth.

  23. Marie says:

    I like the Bumpus’ dogs. Reminds me of home.

  24. Buffy says:

    Ah….the Bumpuses. We must have had neighbours in common.

  25. brookem says:

    This movie is the best, yet I haven’t seen it in years. You’ve inspired me.
    Happy Holidays.

  26. [...] Just a quickie, and not really a blog post, just a yikes! type thing. Dunno how I missed it – must have been all that quivering and avarice – whatever – but Judith Regan got sacked on Friday. [...]

  27. [...] I hear “X5″ I think “BMW”. That’s just me. The other day my dear friend Clare – a total Nigella – told me she’d just ordered the FrancisFrancis! X5 Espresso Machine. In pink. She says “It has a 48-ounce water tank with rear access and a battery-powered clock on the front.” I say “Great. Will stop by to try it out sometime soonish” and think Does it come with a compass in the stock too? [...]

  28. bj says:

    no joke there is just something familiar about those three………

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