not so super model
I blamed it on a 5’11 Dutch model but to be honest, it was his fault for liking Dutch models in the first place.
She was glossy and gorgeous and every time I saw one of those ads I’d have to deal with it. A billboard sized it with slim hips and thighs and an airbrushed face.
I’d always think the same thing. “Well. She has to be thin. If she gains weight she’ll look like a man.” I’d say it to myself. Maybe to Eliza, who bore the weight of the whole will-he-or-wont-he (fall in love with me) conundrum. My friend would listen and she’d drink more beer. Not because I drove her to it or anything (although a lesser lady would have succumbed) but because that’s what Germans do…listen over lager.
He was leaving the country every few weeks. To go here or there. The stick in stilettos moved around. And he moved with her. Then he’d come home and confide in his friend.
I’d pretend not to love by pretending to care. I’d bite my tongue and flutter my lashes and wonder ‘If I had legs like her, would he still call me mate?‘
I soon learned the whole best friend dynamic was highly overrated. Especially when one wanted to lick the other’s face off. I couldn’t help it.
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28 Responses to “not so super model”
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This seems to be such a common plight. This sounds like a situation in the past…I’m dying to know what happened…
I was curious as to where in the UK you live. I’ve been there many times and love visiting.
I agree. This story needs to be continued.
I’ve never had a male as my “best friend”, but I can imagine that having feelings for this person could put a terrible damper on the relationship…
I’ve had lots of male friends in my time, and probably one or two wanted to “like the other’s face off”. As long as they didn’t tell me about it, I was fine.
In your case it turn into a case of him suddenly really seeing you, as a hot chick and potential girlfriend, and realising what’s been around him all this time. Or you might always be the best friend whom he turns to whenever he has girl troubles.
My best friend and I got really drunk and tried to lick each other’s faces of once… it ended when we both started laughing, cause – ew.
Love your blog…keep writing! You’re really great.
We’ve all been there, right? Fab post.
I hear ya and I completely agree!
This seems like a common conundrum a lot females and even males face. We fall for a good friend…while they’re off in dating land.
Sounds to me like he was completely blind. He could only see with his eyes. His loss.
Ugh. I’ve been there recently too. It’s not fun. I decided that I picked the wrong guy anyway. It’s supposed to be easy.
wow. i found you via stephanie klein and quite frankly, would rather spend time here than there. your writing is frank and interesting and intellectual. very well done. and thanks.
Tall and thin is not the only measure of beauty. What about deep and compassionate, present and listening? And chestnut hair and soulful eyes? Gifted writer and faithful friend? Anyone who misses your beauty is blind!
I’m a model specimen:)
When are men going to learn that beauty fades but true friendship lasts forever. Let’s hope that one day the blinders will fall off and he’ll see what a treasure he’s overlooking
“I’d pretend not to love by pretending to care.”
What a great line. And so true. I’ve done the same thing. Thought that if I listened to the bitching and whining about the new girl, that he wouldn’t know I wanted to BE the new girl…
Torture.
Are all Dutch people tall? It seems so. Maybe it’s evolution, natural selection, almost an entire populace living on reclaimed land – below sea level – for generations. Of course, in NYC, eighty-five feet tall models walk the sidewalks everywhere. And a top agency-scout-friend of mine says, “Yes, they are not so smart. But they are very happy.” I hope it’s the drugs.
I’m glad I have been married for the last 21 years. Dating is stressful and complicated. marriage is easier…with the right guy of course.
Who hasn’t felt that?
Holly, I’m always struck by how tall the women are in Holland. But maybe I just noticed the tall ones more because I was always looking for her.
Erin, thank you.
Hattie, sweetheart as ever.
Ohhh. Listening over lager. I love it.
Unrequited love. It is the genesis of many a beautiful poem, book, song, heartache, eh? It’s only hit me once in this lifetime, and I got knocked into a pit the size of which is visible from space. I guess these days I err with caution and don’t allow myself to fall until undying love has already been pledged. It’s not an easy way to live either. This whole dating thing is so dang hard.
Been there. And it is awful. Thank goodness for your Eliza, and all of there other Elizas out there. What would we do without them?
Silly
you know i have written of this at length. i have come to realize that most of us are not supermodels, but we are all deserving of happiness and love.
xo
I’ve had my share of male friends who I had crushes on but never a best friend. I’m guessing this could be particularly difficult. Can’t wait to hear what happened.
You know, after reading this I realized that the overwhelming,burning feeling of desire for that “best guy friend” was actually me wanting to “lick his face off”. I never knew it until now. Thanks Buffy.
Thank you for writing this because I have so guilty of letting many of my “guy friendships” spiral into “guy crushes”!
[...] I blamed it on a 5′11 Dutch model but to be honest, it was his fault for liking Dutch models in the first place. She was glossy and gorgeous and every time I saw one of those ads I’d have to deal with it. A billboard sized it with slim hips and thighs and an airbrushed face. Continued…….. [...]
Oh I have so been there. And you’re right about pretending not to love by pretending to care. If you care about his relationship (and not just its demise), well then obviously you don’t want him for yourself. But even though you don’t want him for yourself, he has to come to the realization that he wants you for himself. And then of course you’ll realize that you want him too. Happily ever after…or that’s the way it’s supposed to happen. Great story.
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Great. Really great. I’m a newish reader who really feels your writing. Many nice details in this piece like Mr. Best Friend unknowingly leading you on with “I do wish she were more like you.” I snickered at the reference to the song ‘I can’t make you love me’ followed by your friend’s unfortunate advice, “Well, it’s bunk.” Guess Bonnie was right after all. Sad but true.
Put those puppies on.
And what happened to the high heels? Still under the bed
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