american psycho
I wake up at 3am. My head hurts and I can’t sleep. I watch Tony Robbins sell confidence on the telly. The sun’s out by 5. Back in by 7. It’s gonna pour.
I’m on my way to work and notice I have on two different socks. Why am I wearing socks? I spend the day at my desk. For lunch I have three bananas and a cup of hot water. Because it’s there.
At 4 I notice my sweater is on backward. I right it at my desk. The Fedex man stares. I don’t care.
I leave work at 5. Trip over my own left foot three times. A chav shoves me at the station. “Sorry Love.” Blows smoke in my face. “Places to be.” I want something hard and flat and painful to hit him with. I feel like a Bret Easton Ellis novel.
An hour later I’m tired and anxious. I can’t wait to get home. Veg out over Cartman and Chianti. I say it out loud when I think it. “Ke-ANN-ti”. Like Lector. Just before he sautes Liotta’s lobes.
Cartoons always make me feel better. Fat kids and cheezy puffs.
I’m not answering the phone tonight.
It’s been one of those weeks…and I don’t know why.
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21 Responses to “american psycho”
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south park makes me happy too. and beer.
For me it’s indulgent reality TV and Jameson on the rocks… yes that sounds lovely right now
Sorry you are having such a yucky week. I completely will sympathize with you! And wine sounds lovely. And more chocolate. And maybe just to be able to knock someone else over the head. Just because.
*hugs*
I *hate* dumb days. And dumb weeks. That is what I call those times that are exactly that. Nothing goes right, and you wonder what the hell is wrong with you, and everyone else for that matter! I can empathize.
Well, that’s a crapfest for you. Sorry, kiddo. It’s been rainy here all week, and I’ve been bloaty and cranky.Perhaps the sun will shine for all of us today.
I always wear different socks. It reminds me that there are always two sides to every story.
I love Cartman and his cheesy poofs.
9 out of 10 doctors recommend cheese puffs for taking care of random jitters.
I love cheesy puffs. And wine. But THREE bananas for lunch? Dang, girl! You got the runs or sumpin’?
I feel this way once a month. The cure is massive quantities of chocolate… and I tell you this as a woman who has tried EVERYTHING.
I know JUST how you feel!
Lifetime “We will overcome our bad: man/job/jail sentence” movies, and potato chips always make me feel better. Or I am too numb to care afterwards
I had one of those weeks as well and sometimes all you need is a little South Park to soothe your soul. I hope next week is better for you.
It has rained everyday except two of the last 16 days. It’s like being in England without Proper Guinness and Chips. Therefore I am not amused or soothed.
BBL must go wine shopping and watch Breakfast at Tiffannys again!
Thanks for swinging through and commenting. this week has been kind of yucky on this end as well…and it is my birthday week. Next time you visit hopefully I will have something more uplifted posted. LOL
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Dang, I HATE those weeks. Sorry you are going through one. Yet, no one writes about them as well as you.
Sending you feel better, perky smooches from here, babe.
it’s cheesy poofs, not cheesy puffs. Sorry, I just had to clarify.
I have weeks like that every week.
Well, I guess: when in a Bret Easton Ellis novel do as a Bret Easton Ellis protagonist will do. Pass the coke or clonopin.
Ha. The FedEx man noticed your shirt was on backwards? I find that men don’t notice much of anything, so maybe he was just noticing you.
this must have been the week it rained 9 days straight here in the states (cleveland) as well. it was bloody awful (i wish i were in england to make that statement sound better!)
my indulgences are old sitcoms and a bit of herbs in a pipe…what do they call those in england?
I end up talking to myself when I drink too. Except it’s never Chianti. Shiner said in all manner of tones and accents.